How Many Laws Are There To Describe Heat?

Now that energy has been dealt with, there now follows the Scientific Equivalent of "What Happened Next....".

In other words, the detailed study of the way heat, or energy, behaved. This was branch of science was called "Thermodynamics" and was defined as the way "heat" (the "thermo" bit) "moved" (the "dynamics" bit).

There were found to be three laws. However, there was more than one way of stating them. The most common was :

1st Law of Thermodynamics: "In a perfectly insulated system, heat is neither lost nor created. "

2nd Law of Thermodynamics: "Perfectly insulated systems only exist at Absolute Zero of temperature. "

3rd Law of Thermodynamics: "Absolute Zero of temperature can never be attained. "

where the term "system" means an isolated bunch of things, such as a kitchen, or a bathroom.

The first Law is simply another way of stating the Conservation of Energy.
The second and third Laws together say 100% efficiency is impossible.

In other words, heat or energy can be freely exchanged but there will always be some unwanted heat produced.

Cynical scientists translate them this way:

Law 1: "You cannot make a profit, only break even"
Law 2: "You can only break even if banking is free"
Law 3; "The bank is always closed"

There's more.....after these three Laws were formulated and called Laws 1, 2 and 3, the scientists realised they had left out an even more fundamental truth than the conservation of energy. It was this:

"If two things have the same temperature as a third, they are at the same temperature as each other."

This was promptly recognised as the REAL first Law, but since they had already been named, it was put before the first Law. What do you call the number before one? Zero, of course.

It was called "The Zeroth Law of Thermodynamics" and officially runs like this....

"If two bodies are both in equilibrium with a third, they are also in equilibrium with each other".

Just how gullible ARE you people? ROTFL!!!!